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What the HECK?/Intro- Rasslin Tape 4 (February 1989)
Welcome to my first attempt at a recap/video review. There are several
writers who do a damn good job of recapping the old WWF PPVs
and major shows ... what gets lost in the shuffle is all
the crappy little matches that the fans had to sit through, along the way.
These would be on USA's Prime Time Wrestling (the pre-cursor to RAW) and
on rare occassions, one match a week on the syndicated shows (The A-level
"Superstars of Wrestling" and B-Level "Wrestling Challenge").
It was tough being a wrestling fan back in those days... all the kids loved
it around Wrestlemania 3 time, but wrestling stopped being "cool" at my school,
shortly after the first Survivor Series. Coincedentally, there was a Saturday Night's
Main Event, right after the Survivor Series that got me hooked on wrestling again.
I was still an awkward adolescent, so all I had was my VCR and a few issues of
"Pro Wrestling Illustrated" that my dad would bring home. Also, around the time of this
tape (early 89), I got hooked on ESPN's "Legends of World Class Championship Wrestling", and
that REALLY got me into wreslting. Sadly, I never felt the urge to tape those
rerun WCCW shows. (which is a shame... I would have loved to have had
Kerry Von Erich vs. Flair on tape. Along with some footage of Iceman King Parsons,
Great Kabuki and Gino Hernandez)... but that's just the personal crap nobody wants to hear
about.
From Wrestlemania 4 (1988), up until Wrestlemania 8 (1992), I rarely missed
a week of the WWF. I would set my VCR tapes on "EP", to record the
PPVs. Then, I would have a few hours let over, and religiously taped every
big name match, in chronological order, to fill out my tape. This is where the PTW and
Superstars matches come in. I never taped the squash/jobber matches (or "Flunky
Matches" as I used to call them)... only the rare free TV matches that
pitted two decent guys against each other. All of these were
taped as they happened, so you can really get a sense of each era
in the Fed. If you lived through this era of
WWF TV, you know what I'm talking about. If not, just read along and
you'll get the feel of this.
This is "Rasslin 4" from my collection of homemade WWF tapes. It includes a
January 1989 Saturday Night's Main Event, the 1989 Royal
Rumble and the NBC-broadcast "The Main Event". Yeah, the show that
featured Hogan/Savage vs. Bossman/Akeem....and also a
stinky Hercules vs. Ted DiBiase match. That was an important show, only because it featured the "Megapowers exploding", as Savage turned on Hogan.
Of course, if I was Hulk, I'd wanna pick up Liz
and carry her off, just like he did... instead of fight two sweaty fat guys and
hang out with Macho Man.
You can probably find reviews of those
matches somewhere else... but here's the obscure stuff that followed on WWF TV. Note:
Some of this stuff might be scattered on old Colisuem videos...but they're not
in chronological order, there :)
Random Match 1- Bushwhackers vs. Bolsheviks
(Luke Williams and Butch Miller vs. Boris Zhukov and Nikolai Volkov)
This was from "Superstars of Wrestling" sometime in early February, 1989.
Vince and Jesse are on the call, and this is the Whackers first high profile match in the WWF.
Vince works in his reluctant "take a look at these fellows". A few fans at ringside
even have a New Zealand flag...so I assume they're holdover, hardcore Sheepherder
fans. Almost immediately, the
Whackers hit the "batering ram".
Basic punch/kick fest. Butch nails Zuhkov with a knee shot and waves to the crowd.
-Nifty personal/local point of interest in this point of the tape: Howard Finkel's
voice cuts in to hype an upcoming card at McNichols Arena. "Big John Studd vs. the
African Dream, Akeem! Tito Santana takes on the Million Dollar Man and
Bret Hart takes on the Honky Tonk Man!" Don't laugh... I actually went to this
show with my buddy Henry!-
Eventually, Luke ends up getting a clubbering as Nikolai hits his one unique move:
the spin-around kick! (Jesse compares him to Baryshnikov). It wasn't too unique, but at
the time, a spin-around kick was pretty rare in the WWF. Soon, everyone tumbles around the ring, with
Butch rolling out to the floor. Nikolai holds Luke as Zuhkov goes up to... OHMYGAWD, the second rope
for a double axehandle. Of course, it's the patented ILLEGAL DOUBLETEAM backfiring on the evil
heels... Luke hops out of Nikolai's hold and Zukhov nails the "Russian". In the immortal words of
Bejamin J. Grimm: "Who'da thunk it?" Butch runs back in,
the Whackers nail Zhukov with their double slam/knee smash thingie for the pin, and the crowd
goes absolutely HAPPY. I remember being confused by the Whackers...the Sheepherders and their
barbed wire matches from over in the NWA had kinda... scared me. I wasn't sure what they were supposed to
be in the WWF. This match clarified the point to me that: "They're goofy New Zealander faces!".
Random Match 2- Brutus the Barber Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect Curt Hennig
I taped this the first week in February... but it probably occurred sometime
in January. This is from the MSG network, and one of those exclusive matches that
Prime Time Wrestling was famous for (at least to me). The crowd is never lit in these
things, and for years, I always thought a "dark match" was one of these MSG thingies.
Hennig is still wearing plain blue trunks...no straps/singlet yet. He's still being
billed as "Mr.Perfect, Curt Hennig", too! (of note, because shortly after this,
the Fed began referring to him as simply "Mr. Perfect"... no "Hennig")
Brutus gets a decent pop and
has the mullet from hell. Commentators are Ron Baumgart (who?) and
Lord Alfred Hayes (in other words, hit MUTE). Brutus basically...punches.
He backs Hennig into the corner and Hennig does his traditional OVERSELL
and flips over the ropes, to the floor. Hennig comes back in and Bruti hits
the headlock. -commercial/studio break. Gorilla mentions "finally some
real competition for Mr Perfect". In a neato bit of foreshadowing, Gorilla asks the Brain
"why don't you have him under your tutelage"?-. Back in, and
it's a clothesline/punch fest. Brutus hits his high knee to Hennig and...-GASP-..it's
"Outlaw" Ron Bass, out to steal Brutus's gym bag!! NOOOOO, not the gym bag!! And you thought
stealing the Undertaker's urn was lame! Bass is still freshly shorn from Brutus at
SNME, so he's looking for some haircutting revenge. And heck hath no fury like a fat
Texan shorn!
Brutus tangles up with Bass, outside the ring.
Hennig hits a double axehandle from the apron, then sneaks back in to win the thing by countout.
Brutus cleans house afterwards to make the fans HAPPY.
Random Match 3- Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart vs. Honky Tonk Man (w/Jimmy Hart)
From Wrestling Challenge, with Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan on play-by-play!
This was to keep the HTM/Greg Valentine vs. Hart Foundation rolling along.
Honky and Valentine were even dubbed "Double Trouble" by Jimmy Hart, for a little bit.
The two teams wrestled singles matches around the country, with Bret taking on
Honky, and Neidhart going after Valentine. The two teams had their "End of Feud
Payoff Match" at Wrestlemania 5. Anvil basically dominates with his
standard power/bulldozer stuff. Honky sells like mad and rolls out of the ring,
clutching his back. Neidhart sticks his head out of the ropes to check on
Honky and gets whapped by Jimmy Hart's megaphone. Heenan chirps in with:
"What happened to Neidhart?? He tried to headbutt Jimmy's horn, there".
Awesome! Neidhart tries to finish off Honky, which only serves to bring
Greg Valentine out for the run-in. Heel beatdown ensues. Bret Hart
runs out to chase off the evil faces and build heat for the Wrestlemania match.
Short match. Maybe four minutes, tops. I don't think Neidhart busted out a
"yeah baby! haha!" in this one... strange!
Random Match 4- WWF Tag Team Championship Match: Powers of Pain (w/ Mr. Fuji)vs. Demolition (c)
(Barbarian and Warlord vs. Ax and Smash)
This was broadcast on a special PTW called "Face to Face", which featured several
double interviews of Wrestlemania 5 participants. I should have taped all
those interviews, as the only one I can remember is one between Ronnie Garvin
and Dino Bravo, moderated by Vincent K. TAgain, this is from
early February 1989. This match features the commentary team of
Lord Alfred Hayes and.... the WWF broadcasting debut of
Tony Schiavone! I remember being floored when I heard
Tony's voice. To me, he was THE voice of the NWA, and I thought this was a big coup
for the WWF.
Seriously, I used to like Tony, back in the day.
The ring dressing and "THE MAIN EVENT"
banners tell us that this match is the same card as the NBC show of the
same name. (see above)
Ax and Smash's best move: the double axehandle/stomp/beatdown, which they hit about
30 seconds into the match. Ax immediately
switches to the chin lock and barks right at "Fuj the stooge"!
("Fuj the Stooge" was the Demos' other catch phrase that they tried to
throw out there...but it never approached the levels of "Kick Yer Stinkin
Teeth In!")
Fuji then hooks Ax's leg with the cane, to turn the tide.
Ax gets pummeled for a bit, as Barbarian hits his
shoulder block and even the "Kick of Fear"... but the move had no name back then.
Fuji tries to hook Ax's throat with the cane. Ax holds the cane to his neck and
sells the choke job. What a pro, that Bill Eadie.
Smash comes in and hits a slingshot/stun-gun onto the ropes (one of my
favorite moves). All Heck breaks out and a clusterfrick ensues.
Warlord works Ax into an elevated bearhug, while Barbarian goes up top
to hit a clothesline from the top turnbuckle.
Smash grabs
the cane of "Fuj the stooge" and beats the crap out of the Powers. Fuji gets up
and throws the ceremonial salt into Ax's grill. Referee Dave Hebner turns around to
call for the DQ. Demos retain and Ax rolls around in pain, like a little
girlie man in face paint and bondage gear. Since they have to act as faces,
Smash tries to comfort his buddy and calls for a medic.
I'm not sure, but I believe this was the first Demos match on my tapes
that has them as faces. This, of course, was a build-up
to the Wrestlemania V 3-on-2 tag match. (Fuji and Powers vs. Demolition). But...
I'm sure some smark-ish freaks out there would recap this match and say
"the original plan here was to have the Powers go over, and then have the Demos
regain the belts at WM5". Ummm...I seriously doubt that.
Random Match 5: Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake vs. Dino Bravo (w/ Frenchy Martin)
Another "feature match" from Wrestling Challenge, with Gorilla Monsoon and
Bobby "the Brain" Heenan. Gorilla notes that this match "would be a main event
in any arena in the country". Both of these guys were in between
feuds at this point, with nothing to do. Brutus had just finished off Ron Bass,
and Bravo had faded out against Jim Duggan. Collar and elbow tie-up to start, and Bravo
segues into the headlock. Shoves Brutus to the ropes and hits him with a shoulderblock.
Clothesline/punch fest ensues. In fact, Gorilla and Bobby spend all their time
discussing the eight matches that were just signed for Wrestlemania V.
Brutus tries for the sleeper, but Bravo makes the ropes and tosses Brutus out thorugh the ropes.
Both guys do their version of Punchamania V, until referee Joey Marella
counts them both out. Bravo misses a charge and eats some ring post. Brutus
chases Frenchy into the ring, and gets to cut off two strands of his hair. Fans go
HAPPY. Bravo distracts Brutus.. and gasp, Brutus runs with scissors, as he chased Bravo.
Bravo and Frenchy escape to the dressing room. Time for some
Brutus- music to make the fans HAPPY.
Random Match 6: "Rugged" Ronnie Garvin vs. "Outlaw" Ron Bass
For some reason, I liked Bass. He was just an angry, loud-mouthed heel from Texas.
If you've never seen Bass, he's like a cross between Albert and Dan "the Beast"
Severn. Like Albert, because he "yaaaaaaaaa's" alot. Like Severn
because he has that stocky build. Garvin is still a relative newcomer to
the WWF at this point. Neither guy receives an entrance... they're both standing
in the ring, and get announced by Mike McGuirk. Something you'd
never see today. This match was apparently out of order, and
looks like it was on the untelevised portion of the March 1989
SNME. Bass makes a big deal out of removing his hat, reluctant to
show off his shaved head. It's actually not too bad, and has grown back.
Announcers Tony Schiavone and Lord Alfred Hayes mention that, of
the two, Garvin has the weirder haircut. That's really gotta hurt ya...
when even Tony and Lord Alfred know that your haircut's dorky.
Collar and elbow tie up...and that results in the standing side headlock!
Hey, were they watching the Brutus-Bravo barnburner. Garvin ducks a punch and
unloads with his "Hands of Stone" punch... which is nothing special.
Taking a cue from Bruti and Bravo, it's Punchamania V, again! Hey look,
an ARMBAR..and plenty more. Jericho would be proud. Bass eventually
misses an elbow drop and yup...here it comes: THE most electrifying move in
predetermined sports competition...the GARVIN STOMP! Bass gets up, and
the morale has not improved, so the beatings continue. Suddenly, Garvin goes up
to the top turnbuckle for a flying body press! Whoa... Bass with a suplex.
Powerslam. Garvin to the ropes, Bass puts his head down and we get a sunset flip for
2! See, they have a few moves! Both guys back to punching and...oh crap..
they brawl outside the ring, again! The Bruti-Bravo influence is felt!
Double countout...AGAIN! This would be the last televised match
Bass did for the WWF. (I saw him at that house show, in mid-March... he lost by
pinfall to The Blue Blazer, aka Owen Hart!).
Random Match 7: Tito Santana and Jim Powers vs. Andre the Giant (w/ Bobby "the Brain" Heenan
This had to have been one of Chico's low points. Being thrown out there
as cannon fodder to Andre, with Jim Powers. Powers was coming off of the
Young Stallions team, who were essentially "jobbers to the stars". Tito was
still doing allright and getting a decent pop... so this was just sad. Tito Santana
vs. Andre the Giant would have been interesting. But the fact that Tito's
out there, on the same level as Jim Powers, is very depressing. The faces
don't even receive intros.. they're introduced with all the pomp the Fed
would use for Tom Stone. This was included on "Superstars of Wrestling"
with Vince McMahon and Jesse the Body Ventura. Big John Studd
cuts a promo in the inset, during the match (Studd would be the special
ref for the upcoming jake Roberts-Andre match at Wrestlemania V). Andre headbutts,
wobbles, and tries a double bear hug. He tosses both guys in the corner
and does the football squash. Suddenly, Jake "the Snake"
Roberts is heard on the house mic. "Andre, Damian and I....are watching
you.... you'll never know where we'll be". Andre looks confused, and
Heenan starts checking around the ring. This whole scenario was vaguely
ripped off by WCW with their "where is Sting?? He could be anywhere!"
effect, during the nWO glory days. Chico with a series of punches to the
big dude. Crowd starts a mild "Ti-to" chant. Andre whips
Chico to ropes and Chico responds with a sunset flip! Powers hits a clothesline
on Andre, and they knock him down. Andre kicks out (actually, ROLLS out), throws
Powers into Chico, sending him to the outside. Andre drops an elbow on Powers for the
3 count. Actualy, Andre just kinda raises his elbow and falls. Always sad
to see Andre in his late days. Jake comes back on the mic and
acts all foreboding and shit.
Random Match 8: Red Rooster vs. "Mr. Perfect" Curt Hennig
From "Superstars of Wrestling", with Vince and Jesse.
Rooster's Terry Taylor, for all three who aren't aware of that.
Still no signet for Perfect. He would debut that look at WM V. This is Rooster's
first big singles match since turning on Bobby Heenan. Match starts out quick,
with some nice hiptosses, armbars and old school wrestling. Hennig even
hits "the Ax" (clothesline/forearm shot from his daddy) at one point. Before these
two can stoop to the level of a wrestling match, Heenan wanders out with the
Brooklyn Brawler, Steve Lombardi. The schtick was Heenan wanted to prove
he could make another nobody into a superstar... like he had (allegedly)
done with the Rooster. Thus, he remade perennial jobber Lombardi into
the Brawler. Brawler distracts Rooster. Rooster turns around and Hennig nails
him smack dab in the forehead with a beautiful dropkick. Rooster
grabs the front of Hennig's trunks and pulls him, neck-first, into the ropes.
(egads! we almost saw "Lil Curt" for a moment... scary). Rooster runs back outside
to fight with the Brawler and it's ANOTHER countout. Hennig gets the win.
Afterwards, Rooster skampers back in and hits Hennig with ONE punch.
Of course, Hennig does his traditional flip oversell, and that makes the
crowd HAPPY. Get jiggy with the Rooster's music.
Why'd you tape this??
Well, at the time, it was VERY rare to see "Superstar vs. Superstar" matches.
I think the Beefcake/Hennig and Demolition/Powers matches made it
onto a "Best of the WWF" video by Coliseum Video. The rest wasn't too amazing.
Too many damn countouts, but that was the norm back then. Most of these matches were
designed as warm-ups, to tease the fans for the upcoming Wrestlemania. These matches
are okay to fill out my Royal Rumble/Main Event tape... but aren't worth tracking down
on their own. Unless you dig headlocks and punches.
Next month (July 2001), I'll be covering the filler matches
leading up to, and maybe even including, Wrestlemania V.
Also included will be one of my LEAST favorite matches of all time:
Thunderlips pinning Bad News Brown and ending the latter's
undefeated streak. Until then... the pleasure has been all ours.
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