SPORTS-(BRONCOS)
Archive
August 21st- Not alot of ground breaking news this week. A couple
of scrubs got cut, Robert Brooks signed...oh, and some linebacker got
busted in some prescription drug scandal.
Everyone seems to be playing this kinda low. Like: "yeah, it's okay
that he smudged some prescription info... but at least he didn't use the
N word!" I'm going to try that defense next time I get busted.
"Sorry I ran that light doing 80 and hit these two kids, officer. But,
I didn't use the N word!" Or; "Yes, your honor... it's true I run
a prostitution service out of the basement of the Catholic School.. but
I never use the N word! And isnt that the real issue here??!! Now give
dismiss my case, ya damn mick!"
GAME RECAP- August 19 vs. Cowboys. W 36-23
Cowboys returner Darren Hall almost broke a record on Saturday night. He almost became
the first guy in NFL history to be cut during a game. He drops the
opening kickoff.. bad enough. Then, on the very next kick, he carries the
rock through a crowd of Broncos with one hand, like it's a freaking box of
Pop Tarts. Yup, he coughs it up again. George Coghill was in on
both plays and increased his "stock" simply by being there.
Griese almost killed Rod Smith on their touchdown hook up. He led Rod
right into the goal post. Rod had to adjust to miss crashing his head
into the goal post. The official word in the papers was "he made
Rod Smith wait". I remembered a similar incident when the Broncos were playing
the Jets at Mile High. I can't recall if it was Al Toon or Rob Moore, but
one of them smashed into the goal post while trying to make a catch. The
imbecilic QB on that play: not sure, but it was either Ken O'Brien or
Browning Nagle. Good company to be in, Griese. I'm sure I'll be comparing
Griese to Gary Hogeboom before this is all over.
After the game, I went downtown for a beer. The typical "sports
crowd" was still lingering around the city, like a puke stain
that won't wash away. There's got to be a NEW addition to
MulletsGalore.com,
the "Bronco Mullet". Description: chubby
dude in his mid to late 20's, wearing a Broncos jersey in public (points
extra if it's not Davis, those are too common), and his
mullet tucked under his 1999 Super Bowl hat. Said mullet will
also get up and scream "yeah, baby! woooooo!" when anything happens.
Immediately followed by the phrase "who was that?" I'm serious.. try
counting this next time the Donkies are at Mile High. You'll hit
20 within MINUTES!
I also overheard a coupla' fat dudes walking out of the bar. "I'm
serious, man" said one fat ass, "there are Cowboy fans in
every city, man. Every city!" Yeah, that's because nobody
wants to actually live in Texas, fat ass!
FINAL CUTS
Distracted again for the second week. I was busy with my semi-annual
comic filing all day Saturday and didn't finish until the second quarter...
||... Gee, just how did Matt Millen do at his referee gig? hey man, I GOTS
ta know....||... Ya can tell it's preseason: The Broncos
broadcast opened with local sports dork Tony Zarella throwing out
HORRIBLE cliches and iditoic play calling. He even said "It's a sold out
crowd, as always, here at Mile High". When was the last time a
PRESEASON game sold out here?? I'm trying, really...||...
To combat my growing nerdiness, I've decided to NOT play fantasy
football this year. Last year, I got carried away and ended
up watching a Redskins game, hoping for Stephen Alexander to catch
a TD pass. Trust me, that was painful... ||... Mike Anderson
got quite a few carries on Saturday night. Even Zarella
noticed this, calling him "Mike Alexander". I really was wanting
to see "Andre Brooks" make a catch!
