Transformers #3 (1984)
Writer: Jim Salicrup
Artist: Frank Springer
Here at the eStragand Corporation we fly independently, free of influence from pop culture trends or big
budget Hollywood productions. We're never influenced by summer "blockbuster" movies and never seek to cash in on
the short-lived popularity of such things. The bandwagon isn't our preferred method of transportation.
Which is why we're covering Transformers #3, which not only features the Autobots and Decepticons, but also
spotlights Spider-Man in his black symbiote costume.
Released as part of the original Transformers min-series, this was probably the most popular
comic of 10 year old boys in the summer of 1984. In fact, my copy has a wrinkly cover, caused
by constant reading and oogling when I invited a buncha' buddies over to use the pool and
read comics in September 1984. 10 year old boys diving into a pool, mixed with comics, are never
good ingredients for preserving your book's condition.
Now, I won't get into the whole mythology or background of the Transformers. Simply
because I never "got" them. I have my reasons for disliking the entire franchise, that
you can probably track down elsewhere. Mainly, I couldn't get over the difference in scale
of the toys. A regular size handgun and tape recorder, then three different scales of vehicles and
weird looking metallic animals. Also, as I grew older (12), the lack of female characters led my
adolescent interests elsewhere...to say, Scarlett and the Baroness from GI Joe.
But at one time (1984), I was obsessed with the Transformer toys.
And since it was the 80's, that meant every toyline had a comic.
So this story starts off with the EVIL Decepticons ransacking raw materials. They've kidnapped
mehcanic and Autbot buddy, Sparkplug Witwicky, who has devised a special process to create fuel
for all Transformers. Under the threat of being blasted with the particle canon from Decepticon
boss Megatron, Witwicky has agreed to help 'em out.
But the Decepticons have built a giant fortress in Oregon and it hasn't gone unnoticed by the public.
Including the US military, Marvel crossover whores Nick Fury and SHIELD, plus the Daily Bugle's
Robbie Robertson. Robertson has dispatched photgrapher Peter Parker to Oregon, while Nick Fury
simply whines and hopes that a certain "giant lizard" isn't on the loose again. We've talked about
it before, but this one panel apperarance just ups
Fury's crossover total, as I'm fairly certain he has the all-time lead or is very close to Spider-Man.
As the media and the army congolomerate outside of the Decepticons' fortress, Autobot honcho Optimus Prime
has dispatched Gears to scout ahead. Peter Parker obviously decides that he can get a better look at the action
as Spider-Man and quickly changes into his alter ego. Since this was the symbiote outfit, all
Spidey has to do is think about it, and his costume can change into anything. Anyways, Spidey
runs into the scouting Gears and after a brief (and obligatory) misunderstanding, soon
teams up with him. Gears introduces Spidey to the other Autobots and before we know it, it's
a full-scale Marvel Team-Up. It's just one of Spidey's traits that he's such a natural
team-up star. His job as a freelance photographer opens him up to so many possibilities. Plus,
his personality's so likable and open, that it's easy to write him into any crossover.
The Marvel/Hasbro inter-company crossover |
Spidey hops into Hound, the Autobot army jeep and leads a convoy past the military blockade.
Spidey's plan involves posing as an army officer, so he steals the helmet of an unsuspecting soldier. A bit eccentric,
because as we saw two pages ago, Spidey's costume can form into anything. A helmet wouldn't be out
of reason. Spidey was just being a dick.
As Spidey and the Autobots approach, the Decepticons come out to play. They start attacking the military and flinging
tanks around. Not surprisingly, this starts another unofficial crossover. The tanks the Deceps toss
around look exactly like the GI Joe MOBAT and Wolverine. The soldiers themselves appear like the typical
Easy Company generic grunts, but the tank similarity was enough of a tease to give 10 year old boys
conniptions.
Like every kid in America, Thundercracker is pissed off that his MOBAT no longer works |
During the scuffle, Gears and Spidey manage to sneak off and inflitrate the fortress. They rescue Witwicky,
while Spidey manages to embarass Megatron. As they're escaping, Gears falls off a cliff, seemingly to his death. Spidey's
concerned, but as the show, errrr...comic wraps up, the Autobots have taken Gears back to their base and rebuilt him. The
Auotbots' concept of "death" is greatly different from a human's. Spidey
thanks the guys for the fun and heads off. Witwicky was rescued, but nothing was really solved, since the bad guys now
have a way to produce fuel. Plus they have a big ol' base and aren't paying Oregon property taxes.
Megatron umm...rips one. Poor Gears. |
Optimus Prime gives a little speech to the cast and while the comparison isn't really noticeable in this
particular story, he IS a robotic version of Papa Smurf. Think about. Both were the boss of their
little crew and older than dirt. Both would spout little morals at the end of the story. Both were
full of worthless knowledge that'd they conveintently reveal at the right time. Most imporantly,
both had red, white and blue color schemes.
There are a few more weird occurences in this story. I'm not a Transformers follower, but I don't
recall Gears having a starring role like he did here, ever again. Either in the comics or the cartoons. So maybe
he really did "die" at the end.
The unofficial GI Joe crossover isn't that weird when you consider that
Frank Springer drew this thing. Springer also drew several issues of the Joe comic, so I'm sure
he snuck in the MOBAT and Wolverine either as practice or a little inside joke. About a year later,
there was an issue of Spider-Man (either "Web of" or "Amazing". I forget which), where Spidey's
dealing with a skyscraper converted to gold....and an army officer with a very close resemblance
to Duke shows up.
But the real crossover
connundrum occurs with Spider-Man himself. With his appearance (plus SHIELD and Robbie Robertson), it's established
that the Transformers are in the mainstream Marvel Universe (or "616" for you uber-nerds). Transformers villain Circuit-Breaker also
made a cameo appearance in "Secret Wars II" a year later. Nothing unusual, since Marvel seemed to do this with
all of their licensed tie-ins (Shogun Warriors, Micronauts, even Team America).
Not a problem, right?
Well, about two years later, the Transformers had a (crappy) crossover mini-series with the GI Joe comics.
The Joe comics had always existed in their own separate world and writer Larry Hama seemed to go out of his
way to keep it that way. It was the one licensed tie-in that lived on its own, with no Marvel Universe
interaction. But if the Joes are now meeting the Transformers--- with no explanation of
a dimension-hop or anything--- that would mean that they (the Joes) are also in the mainstream Marvel U. The issue
was never adressed. Years later Hama mentioned that the Joe/Transformer mini-series wasn't an official
part of GI Joe canon since he didn't write it and had never even read it. Good enough. BUT...
in 1993, Hama brought the Transformers back into the Joe comics, with references to the previous (crappy)
crossover mini-series. Fans have concocted explanations saying that the Transformers teamed up
with the Spider-Man of "their world", not the regular Spidey of the Marvel U. But then whattabout SHIELD,
wouldn't the Joes have run into them? Since the Pit was located in
Staten Island, wouldn't the team have had some encounter with any of the countless villains or
heroes across the river? It's perplexing anyway you look at it.
And yes, it probably only really matters to some dork who read Spider-Man and GI Joe comics from
1982 to 1994.
I remember having multiple copies of this book and giving them all away to my friends. I felt like a proud poppa,
because not only would my friends tell me how cool they thought the book was, but they started asking me about
Spider-Man and his nifty new costume. Ah yes, lad...come, let me tell you of Spidey's costume, as we
lunch over pocketburgers, corndogs and milk in the school's cafeteria. Since this book had the equivalent
of THREE television/toy tie-ins (remember, Spidey still had
his "Amazing Friends" show on NBC), it was a huge hit and we were the target audience. Fond memories of
this book for that reason....even if it's a rather forgettable story. I'll have my usual rating below, but
if I could take the Cosmic Treadmill back to 1984 and rate this thing, it'd give it a full $2.50 rating. Viewing it
as a comic reader, this story sorta' sucks.
Well that about wraps it up for another independent comic review. Come back soon for another
review, totally free of Hollywood influence, as we recap a story about a swarmy English schoolboy who is whisked
away to an academy for aspiring wizards!
Summary: Spidey and Gears do the Marvel Team-up gig.
Cover Price: .60
Rating: .75
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