COMICS-G.I. Joe : The Pyramid of Darnkess (Part 1)
Intro/What the Heck??!!
Yet again, I dove into the bowels of eStragand Land and found
a six-hour compilation tape from my younger days. These tapes are kinda
funny.. I taped this one probably in seventh or eighth grade, circa 1987 or so. It took me ahwile
to grow up (umm.. I grew up?), so half of these tapes
are little kids' stuff and the other half is teenager/MTV crap. In between the
GI Joe, Super Powers and Transformers cartoons are Def Leppard,
David Lee Roth and Judas Priest videos. There's also the original "Hobbit" cartoon and
Disney's "Robin Hood" movie mixed in amongst these. Damn, I loved the VCR's "EP"
mode back in the day.
At the time, I
thought all the hair band videos made me feel mature...and the cartoons were just there
out of some immature habit. I suppose it's ironic that it's about 15 years later and
I'm watching the cartoons and could care less about the music videos.
I'm curious what I was thinking at the time. Like someone
in the future would want to plop in a tape to watch "Shake Me" by Cinderella, immediately
followed by a GI Joe cartoon? My first memory of making a compilation tape
was back in 1985, when I stayed home sick from fifth grade. I kept doing these
tapes up until high school began in Fall 1988. This particular tape had no identification on it.
I had to sift through the whole thing: which featured "Gi Joe: The Movie", one semi-cool
Iron Maiden video ("Stranger in a Strange Land"), an episode of "PeeWee's Playouse"
along with a VERY watchable episode of "Thunderbirds 2025". Finally at the end of the tape,
was "The Pyramid of Darkness"- probably the last GI Joe cartoon I ever taped as
a youngster.
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| Alpine understands the importance of flexibility
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Would you Please Shut The Hell Up and Get Things Started?!!
Anyways, "Pyramid of Darkness" was the third GI Joe mini-series. It originally
aired in the Fall of 1985 and, in some markets, was shown in its entirety before the daily
cartoons premiered. As it is, it's the official kick-off for the first full season
of GI Joe cartoons. Along the way, we're introduced to some of the new 1985
characters, concepts and vehicles. 1985 saw the release of Hasbro's fourth
wave of GI Joe schwag. It also was probably GI Joe's peak year. The line was insanely
popular by that time and had what equated to
TWO Grammy Awards in the cartoon world- a daily syndicated cartoon and a breakfast cereal.
Plus, the comic book was still a hot commodity among comic nerds. 1985 was GI Joe
overload, and this single year is probably the reason so many kids knew about (or hated) GI Joe.
Looking back, 1985 was the year that put GI Joe over the top and had the concept
drilled into the head of every American male under 14 (including a few dweebs OVER that age as well).
Take away 1985 and GI Joe would have been flung with MASK, Sectaurs, Go-Bots and other
second-tier toy concepts.
"Pyramid of Darkness" begins with part 1- "The Further Adventures of G.I.Joe". The
episode opens with a space shuttle launching, which made all us little rugrats think:
Wow, it's BIG TIME, now..they're going into OUTER SPACE. Expectedly, Cobra immediately
springs an ambush and attempts to thwart the launch. Apparently taking a cue from "The Revenge of
Cobra" series, the Joes have several SHARCs and a Slugger tank hidden in
mechanical mountains, to act as reinforcements. Several Cobra HISS tanks, Flight Pods and
Rattler planes attack the shuttle, shooting a giant net over the vessel.
Cobra Commander leads the HISS battalion, Destro's with the Rattlers and
the Crimson Guard Commanders lead the Flight Pods.
Flint and Lady Jaye are flying Skystrikers and lead the aerial resistant, while
Alpine and Bazooka jump out of the shuttle on jetpacks. Alpine hops onto
a Flight Pod to nail Xamot and we're introduced to the goofy twin concept.
"uuh..I feel what my brother feels!"
(Personally, I would have named them "Bob" and "boB").
The twins are knocked into a nearby river, and a retreating Cobra Commander soon drives his
tank into the drink as well. Before the Joes can apprehend the three, two giant
Cobra water robots pop out of the river to save the baddies. Flint is suddenly on the ground,
and orders Shipwreck and Snake-Eyes to lead a SHARC squadron into the river. The two are joined
by their corresponding mascots- Polly and Timber. Keeping with the rules of my GI Joe Drinking game:
"Whenever an animal is seen in any cockpit with his owner, take a drink".
Roadblock's also along for the ride...cuz it must be time, to squash Cobra slime. Flint's
upset that the Cobra "biggies" have gotten away. Well, we DID see Scrap Iron driving
a Stinger during the ambush...but I guess nobody gives a rat's ass about HIM.
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| Animal in cockpit or turret = DRINK
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Very next scene, Flint's back in his Skystriker and pursuing Destro's Rattler. Huh?
Always suspected that the cartoon version of the Skystrikers were VTOL or
something.
Destro's on the radio, talking to "My dear Co-mmander"
(Drinking Game: anytime Destro refers to ANYONE as "My Dear _____", take a drink)
Destro gives Flint and Lady Jaye the slip by landing his Rattler in the
Extensive Enterprises tower. Meanwhile, Snake-Eyes and Shipwreck's team have been fighting the
water robots. Snake-Eyes and Shipwreck both have their SHARC tossed into the river floor, but
Roadblock and the others have theirs deposited out of the river.
Shipwreck and Snake-Eyes lay low, then follow the water robots out into the ocean.
But there was that space shuttle launch...well, turns out that it was headed for
"GI Joe Space Station Delta", where Duke's in command.
Mutt, Steeler, Dusty and "Sgt.Popper" are flying.
Since Mutt's around, that means his pooch Junkyard is also in the cockpit.
Take a drink. The Joes notice extra weight, but lucky for them,
Junkyard is one of those "Extra Weight Sniffing Dogs". (they're on the news..
but not as much as their contemporaies, the "Drug Sniffing Dogs" or "People Locating
Dogs"). The Joes land and inspect their unusual cargo. It's a large crate, filled with
....furry animals? Scarlett takes a liking to them, but Mutt finds a disturbing note
about the "Fatal Fluffies", signed by Cobra Commander. (Fortunately, Cobra
Commander's handwriting is perfectly legible Helvetica)
Back to the water, as Snake-Eyes and Shipwreck have tailed the water robots to
an undersea Cobra base. They decide to swim into the base,
and it's time for another drinking game moment:
Whenever Shipwreck is seen swimmimng underwater, and he still has
his sailor on, take a drink. While the two Joes ditch their SHARCs and sneak into the base,
Cobra Commander and the Crimson Twins head to the control room to
talk about their plan. The shuttle attack was just a diversion. Cobra Commander
shows a video, where a Rattler was able to sneak in and plant an extra cargo
container on the shuttle. CC then details his plan to create a "Pyramid of
Darkness". Cobra will plant contol cubes in four specific places around the world.
The cubes will then link up with the space station and cast a giant
pyramid-shaped shadow over the world. Under this shadow, no mechanical device
can function. Much cackling follows. (Drinking Game: Everytime a Cobra villain
cackles, take a drink)
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| Junkyard don't do cute n' fuzzy
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Up on Space Station Delta, "Sgt.Popper" has revealed himself as Zartan (Drinking Game:
anytime Zartan removes a skin tight mask to reveal his regular hood underneath...
take a drink. Also works for the Baroness, but only if she has her glasses on, underneath)
He blows a whistle and the little fluffies grow to about 10 feet, gain
steel skin, laser pistols, whips and can now breathe fire. The Dreadnoks
were also stowed away and make themselves known. They quickly take over
the space station and enslave the Joes. Zartan takes a liking
to Duke and keeps him captive in the control room. This marks the third year in a row
that Duke's been captured in the opening episode. Aside from Dusty and Mutt, the
space station crew is made up of original Joes, so don't expect them to
get much screen time (Steeler, Clutch, Rock n Roll, Scarlett, Duke and a buncha
nameless flunkies).
Meanwhile, Snake-Eyes and Shipwreck find a subterranean railroad, populated by Cobra workers.
They take out two workers, steal their uniforms and infiltrate the work crew.
Funny scene as Shipwreck deliberately acts like an asshole to avoid suspicion from
the Cobra workers.
Back to the space sation, where Zartan sends a special message on "Joe frequency" to
GI Joe HQ. Flint and the other joyously answer it, but it allows Zartan to lock onto
the HQ and blast it from space. The entire complex is set afire, but
this being the cartoon, nobody dies. A FIRE? Yup, this allows new Joe Firefighter,
Barbeque, some screen time to actually put out a fire! Flint's peeved and
rallies the troops to fight back against Cobra.
Snake-Eyes and Shipwreck are still sneaking around the Cobra workforce.
They make it to the work-site, but there's a robotic sentry
performing security voice checks. Shipwreck overhears "Hail Cobra Commander, the
great snake rules forever" and believes that's the password. He tries, but
his voiceprint doesn't match. The robot immediately sounds the alarm.
Spikes pop out of the walls as they begin to contract. Bars block
the front and back. Then, saw blades pop out of the floor and advance towards our heroes!
Gasp! It's; "...to be continued on tomorrow's GI JOE!"
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| "Holy Cliffhangers, Shipwreck!"
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Overview/Dumb Comments
The opening shuttle sequence is very fast-paced and somewhat exciting.
A GI Joe shuttle launch was a favorite of mine, as the first GI joe comic
I ever read (#8) centered around Cobra attacking a NASA space shuttle launch in Florida.
Something I was finally able to re-create when I got the Defiant
Shuttle Complex a few months later.
However, this sequence quickly loses credibility as Cobra shoots a giant net over the shuttle.
Later, it seems even more ridiculous that a
Rattler could sneak in underneath the netting, shoot laser beams that
open the shuttle doors, and plant a cargo pod without anyone noticing.
Other stupid stuff: We're given no explanation why "Sgt.Popper" is along for the ride.
A simple "We're glad the Army sent you along for the ride, Popper.
Nice to have some outside help every now and then" would have sufficed. We're not told if
he's a Joe, Pentagon brass, a flunkie, or anything.
There's also no explanation
on what type of mutant creatures the Fatal Fluffies are. Did Destro make them?
Are they robots? Genetic experiments? Furthermore, the Joes don't seem too
shocked to see these little aliens wander out from their crate. I suspect that
the Fatal Fluffies might have been a shot at all the cute 80's toys.
Stuff like Care Bears, Monchichi and what not.
A closer look has Shipwreck talking about "Enterprise City", which would become the
generic city for the series. Obviously modeled after New York, but it seems
awfully peculiar when we're shown how the skyscrapers suddenly STOP on one side of the river.
The other side is a completely barren desert, as if the city had a strict border. It is a little
funny that GI Joe is allowed to launch their shuttle right next to downtown.
I imagine the citizens of Enterprise City might say "oh, don't cross the river..that's
where GI Joe always fights Cobra". This distinct border would be seen again, in
"The Germ" episode. It's also not clear if the underwater scenes are still in the river, or
out in the ocean. It appears that the underwater base might be connected to
the Extensive Enterprises tower, but it's not clear.
One little tidbit of triviata. During the opening ambush, Cobra Commander can be seen
atop a deluxe HISS tank. It's tough to make out every detail, but it appears
to be a larger HISS, with two seats in the cockpit and two additional
gun turrets on each side. I think it would appear again, on
rare occasions. We're not allowed a longer look, as Flint flies his Skystriker
right at it, and splits
the tank in two with his wing. Again, that's stretching the believablity envelope.
Shipwreck takes a central role, as he seems to be a favorite of
the cartoon's creative team. He comes off like Han Solo, in some ways.
If you remember the cartoon's canon,
the Joes originally met him as a shady mercenary in a bar. His redeeming
factor being that he had his own transportation. Almost identical to
the way Han was introduced. He often alluded to being a former smuggler,
rogue, and all around 'scondrel'. Plus, his personality is
an identical match: an egotistical
smart-ass, who thinks he's somewhat of a ladies' man. You could even make
the case that Polly was his "Chewie", although Snake-Eys acts like his sidekick
in this particular story.
It has its faults, but this opening episode brought a new wrinkle to
the "we gotta find three things in three remote locations" formula.
Not too shocking, but there's a FOURTH location/thing. The space station
was also a new touch, but was never seen again.
Look for the recap of part two, next week!
Cobra starts planting the cubes, Dusty sings, Timber drives, and
the USS Flagg debuts! All in PART TWO of The Pyramid of Darkness:
"Rendezvous in the City of the Dead"!
